Make Love AND War

Because We Think with Our Dicks.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Testicular Fortitude For All

Tip of the day No. 1
Punch (Closed fist - gloved or otherwise) a friend in the face and ask him to return the favour... Eradicate anger, resentment and reclaim your manhood. The world will be a better place.

Tip of the day No. 2
Make love to your woman like it's the last time you'll ever get to do it. Forget your own orgasm. Keep giving and expect nothing back. Be selfless, be magnanimous and be good at sex. The world will be a better place.

Tip of the day No. 3
Make a kid laugh - Give em money, make a dumb-ass outta yourself, fart loudly... anything... let go of the uptight, anal adult in you. The world will be... blah blah blah... just friggin do it.

Tip of the day No. 4
Hug your Mom... then your Dad, for longer than 5 secs. And say loudly, "I'm sorry I was such a shitty little brat, here's some money." Fuck all the shit that they used to do to you... Forgive, try to forget and move on... Nobody's perfect.

Tip of the day No. 5
Form an opinion about government. Doesn't matter what that opinion is, just have one. Fuck, if every single taxi driver has one so should you. And think about it long enough for you to want to do something about it. Doesn't matter to what degree - even talking about it to a taxi driver counts. Have a say in how your life is ruled - Hell, what are we? Friggin Communists?

Tip of the day No. 6
If you wake up thinking your job sucks - it probably does. Life's too short to do shit you hate - and getting crap money for. Move on, move fast and move up. Fuck mediocrity.

Tip of the day No. 7
Strive to be an awesome specimen. Work out, masturbate, pierce, have lots of sex, tattoo but most of all appreciate and rediscover the most wonderous God-given machine that you will ever own - Your Body. Take care of it and it will take of you.

Tip of the day No. 8
Alternate slow 'I love you sex' with 'crazy-animal-guerilla-fucks'. Unadulterated, uncensored, unmentionable, lust-induced, dirty, perverted romps that make you sweat like a pig. It's good to be sore sometimes.

Tip of the day No. 9
Read a fucking book.